How Often Should a Chosson and Kallah Meet?

When a chosson told the Rebbe that he was facing problems with his engagement, the Rebbe replied that they were the result of one problem: the excessive meetings with his kalla.

chosson and kalla, who had been engaged for a while, suddenly faced difficulties. The chosson wrote to the Rebbe that he has many problems with the kalla, and is considering breaking off the shidduch.

As a response, the Rebbe took the original letter of the chosson, and drew an arrow from the word “problems” to the margin of the page. There the Rebbe wrote:

“There is only one problem. And that is the number of times that you have met with the kalla during the engagement period, etc., in a manner that is not compatible with the Shulchan Aruch at all.

“And this is actually the source of all your problems.”

The Rebbe concluded with a promise: “When you will cease to follow orders from your yetzer hara, all the other problems will cease.”

(Simpson Teshurah, Elul 5771)

From The Weekly Farbrengen by Merkaz Anash

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