‘Start Them Young’ Suggests Concerned Parent

In a short video, Rabbi Meir Geisinsky explains how the 2020 shidduch scene is changing, and why singles should enter an online database as soon as they’re of age.

By Anash.org reporter

Over the past few years, many people have started noticing a disheartening trend.

“Not enough shidduch happens,” Rabbi Meir Geisinsky of the Five Towns told Anash.org. “People can be in shidduchim for years and still not meet the right one. It’s time to take a look at our system and see how we can make it most effective.”

Several months ago, a lightbulb went off in Rabbi Geisinsky’s head. This is an age in which almost every problem can be solved using modern technology; why not utilize technological tools to help with the current shidduch situation?

“There are websites out there that are meant to serve this purpose,” said Rabbi Geisinsky, who founded Shluchim Achdus, an email forum with 1800 members. “Many, however, are not utilizing them.”

100 years ago, shidduchim were as simple as going outside your front door and looking down the block. You had a son, your neighbor had a daughter, it was a shidduch! 50 years ago it was all about knowing the right shadchan to call. You’d meet a girl at a wedding, send someone to pursue her, and before long you were planning a wedding.

Baruch Hashem, Lubavitch has grown exponentially. In addition to much higher numbers, we’re also spread out all over the world; as a result, you’re unlikely to casually run into your child’s bashert at just the right time. Similarly, the top shadchanim may not know both your child and his or her bashert, making it rather difficult to match them up.

Enter ‘Shidduchim in Lubavitch,’ better known as SIL. The website, developed by Rabbi Geisinsky together with Moshe Raichman from chabadmatch.com, is designed to bring the ‘shidduch scene’ into the modern era.

All parents of Lubavitch singles are encouraged to upload their profiles to the site as soon as they’re ready to find their bashert and begin building a home. Why wait until our children are older and have suffered through years of heartache?

While Shidduchim in Lubavitch is modeled after ChabadMatch, which has Baruch Hashem contributed to over 270 shidduchim since 2009, the two sites operate very differently.

ChabadMatch was designed to give shadchanim the ability to see who is out there, allowing them to work their magic; in contrast, the goal of SIL is to allow parents, who know their child best, to find a potential match. Parents will be able to access the profiles that have been uploaded to the website and see who seems to fit the description of what their child is seeking in a soul mate.

“We’ve heard from parents that they want to be able to control how much information is out there about their child,” said Rabbbi Geisinsky. “There are no ‘required questions;’ parents can choose what information they want to fill in, based on their comfort level. Similarly, pictures are not required, though we do recommend that they are included.”

So what are they waiting for?

“We’ve gotten a lot of support from parents and others involved in the field, and our website is ready,” Rabbi Geisinsky said. “Right now we’re working on building up a database. We need a minimum of 200 bochurim and 200 girls to register we launch this service.”

Visit ShidduchimInLubavitch.com to register your child and take a significant step towards securing their future happiness.

To ask questions or share suggestions regarding the site, reach out to Rabbi Geisinsky at [email protected] or [email protected].

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